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Lucy Visits Grauman’s

Lucy Visits Grauman’s—I Love Lucy season 5, originally aired 10/3/1955

Lucy visits Graumans - Lucy and Ricky discuss her souvenirsLucy Visits Grauman’s is a very funny episode of I Love Lucy—a true classic.  It begins innocently enough, with Lucy (along with Fred and Ethel Mertz) trying to decide where to go while they’re in Hollywood.  Lucy decides for the group that they’ll go to Grauman’s Chinese Theater, where many celebrities have their footprints, hand prints and signatures in the cement blocks outside of the theater.  When Lucy notices that the cement block containing John Wayne’s signature is loose, she begins to have an idea … about the ultimate souvenir to take home to New York.

Later that night, they return to Grauman’s, attempting to steal the block of cement containing John Wayne’s signature.  It’s a very funny segment, ending with Lucy putting her foot in it — literally.  Lucy steps in a pail of quick-drying cement, and has her foot entrapped.  Another hilarious moment follows, as she tries (with the help of the Mertzes) to hide her ‘condition’ from her husband Ricky.  This obviously fails, and now the question remains: what are they going to do about John Wayne’s missing cement block?

Lucy Visits Grauman’s is one of the classic I Love Lucy episodes, and leads into the next one with John Wayne as guest star; it is available as part of the I Love Lucy season 5 DVD collection.

Funny quotes from I Love Lucy—Lucy Visits Grauman’s

Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): But caviar!  Five dollars a jar!
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): [hanging up a banner, hits his thumb with hammer] Ow!


To my darlin’ another Marlon.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Marlon?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Sure, like Marlon Brando.  Do you know another Marlon?
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Yeah, Marlon Monroe.


Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): “To my darlin, another Marlon”—Well, I guess Brando and I have a lot in common.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Yeah, I can’t understand either of you when you speak.


Fred Mertz (William Frawley): [taking picture] Look at me and smile, Ethel!
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Make up your mind, I can’t do both.


Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Well, I can’t think with all this cement wrapped around my foot.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Oh, is that where your brains are?


Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Okay, let’s have the story.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Story? What makes you think there’s a story?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Well the Mertzes are in their beds with their clothes on and you have your foot in what seems to be a block of cement. I just thought there would be a little explanation.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): You’d think so, wouldn’t you?


Fred Mertz (William Frawley): [after Lucy’s foot is caught in a bucket of cement] I would hate to be the next shoe salesman who waits on you.


Tourist Husband: Excuse me. Are you sitting on John Wayne?


Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Ethel, if you’re going to get chicken on a routine souvenir hunt …
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Routine?!


Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Lucy, you’re a natural born crook.


Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I’m going to take home a souvenir to end all souvenirs, John Wayne’s block.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Well, you’ll need it because when Ricky finds out what you’ve done he’ll knock yours off.


Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): What are you doing?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Comparing my leg to Betty Grable’s.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Oh, it looks identical.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Oh, to you and me maybe, but I doubt it would fool Harry James.


Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): What will we see first?
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): I vote for Catalina.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): I vote for Catalina.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I vote for Grauman’s Chinese.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): We got the majority.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I got the car.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance) and Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Grauman’s Chinese.


Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Okay warden, when do we leave?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Well just as soon as you can get ready. How long will it take you?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Six years.


Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): I guess Brando and I do have a lot in common.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Yeah, I can’t understand either of you when you talk.

Originally published at Clown Ministry

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